Hiya and welcome to my nightmare. Hopefully this effort is worth both my time and that of any readers that may happen through. Mostly it's commentary with a little information and some literary sleight of hand. Depending on the day or mood things could get hairy so bear with me here.
I appreciate the time you spent checking this out, thanks.
Horsing around aside, "it's time to get down to get down to brass tacks". What, one may ask, is the point of it all? Stress relief..... like scented candles, but with ranting and diatribes. Occasionally something will catch my attention and get me to slow down for a minute. A couple such instances have happened as of late, I have merely been taking time to reflect upon them to discern what (if anything) I can learn from them. The first was an unfortunate accident which set things back for my family in a financial sense, not worth discussing here. Another was the slashing of ZetaMans tires, this I will say a bit about. The third is the assumed title of vigilante by RLSH. You can bet your ass I have a bit to say here. Mayhaps I'll come upon something else of interest along the way, but this is my foundation. And away we go.
THE OPENING SALVO?
Of paramount interest to many was the slashing of Zeta's tires by an individual or individuals that left behind a R.O.A.C.H. flier to insinuate that this act had been perpetrated by the satirical organization of that name. This is of course, most likely a "frame job" or a fan seeking the attention of The Potentate and his associates. If so, this is the equivalent of saying "I'm your #1 fan and to prove it I'm implicating you in the destruction of private property and the leaving of what could be construed as a threat against the owner of the aforementioned property! LOOK AT ME!" Dumb-ass. Of course Zeta and ApocalypseMeow (his wife) have taken things in stride. Having spoken to the members of R.O.A.C.H., as well as local Law Enforcement, he (ZetaMan) is not worried and has no need to be. While escalation into idiocy is feared by many (I could see it happening, people don't think sometimes) if level heads are maintained, it's clear sailing. If the perpetrator is smart it was a one-time affair.... it's not like the guys at R.O.A.C.H. are happy at being made a target of. Or of having some fool pull a low-class stunt like slashing tires, they have words, they "Roast" people.... why act like punk kids about it when you can flame someone? While not honored or esteemed colleagues, we should neither shun them or abuse them simply because they think they're funny or call themselves villains. They are funny sometimes and I could call myself a Leprechaun all month long and it wouldn't end me up with any more gold than I have to begin with. Of course it goes without saying that only a handful of those labeled RLSV are worth their blog topics. For those that are, we should leave the lines of communication open and encourage a productive flow of idea exchange and constructive criticism. These guys don't need to be encouraged to become the first "real deal" super villains.
Onward to the next topic;
VIGILANTE-
A vigilante is someone who illegally punishes someone for perceived offenses, or participates in a group which metes out extrajudicial punishment to such a person. Often the victims are criminals in the legal sense, however a vigilante may follow a different definition of criminal than the local law. Members of community watch programs and others who use legal means of bringing people to justice are not considered vigilantes. For example, in 1979 Curtis Sliwa founded the Guardian Angels in New York City, a recognized crime fighting organization that now has chapters in many other cities. (from the Wikipedia)
This word has been used by members of the RLSH community to describe their status or activities most likely since the beginning. Veterans and new-comers alike post it every time they comment on something. At this stage in the game it's almost like a pixel in your desktop image.... unnoticed. A word that does not simply imply, but in part actually means illegal is an acceptable adjective for a possible role model to describe themselves with? When the fuck did this happen? Going out your door and looking for an ass to kick is a criminal action. The carrying of bladed objects with the intention of using them on or throwing them at another person is idiotic, grossly negligent and easily transmutable into assault with a deadly weapon, involuntary manslaughter, assault with the intent to inflict grievous bodily damage, homicide, weapons charges and a number of other unfortunate messes a self respecting hero should avoid. The carrying of weapons considered illegal in your area should not be something made into a habit. When it comes down to it, even crossing the smaller lines brings us one step closer to what we seek to stop..... one bad apple and all that.
In the comic book world during the nineteen nineties, a concept introduced earlier with characters like the Punisher, Venom and Wolverine was explored and exploited. The angst-ridden Anti-Hero was born. His lines were blurred to the point of being a part of the periphery and he carried a Big Fucking Gun to back his shit up. Did they call him a vigilante? No, because that term was already thrown around in reference to heroes like SpiderMan and DareDevil. The thing about these heroes is they were usually fighting against insurmountable odds and enemies that eclipsed their power levels. These guys use only the force necessary to get the job done, but never take a life. Their thoughts are not usually "Oh yeah! Gonna go kick some ass tonight!" it's usually more "Dammit! Why'd this have to happen? When am I gonna go home? Did I miss the latest Deadliest Warrior?" or something like that. In reality, the amount of damage inflicted upon comic baddies would garner multiple charges and lawsuits. We cannot use, cone using or even allow for others to perceive our motives to be the use of vigilante action. The communities and people we wish to help could easily choose to deem our activities illegal given proper motivation. And who among us has an arctic fortress in which to hide from the eyes of the Law?
The kind of thought invited by the use of this word is essentially counter-productive. If activity considered vigilante and therefore illegal is not condoned, how can an RLSH use it to describe their status? Is the allowance of vigilantes not an act that infers acknowledgment and acceptance of such activity?
When one joins the RLSH community and becomes, essentially, a volunteer public servant, they are joining a Real Life group focused on creating a safer and brighter future, not a fraternal order of cos-players. While you may assume another identity and mannerisms in this guise, you are still bound by law. Just because you have the equipment and opportunity to.... you can't go ape-shit on the perpetrator of a crime unless you're a Police Officer given probable cause. Even then, the use of excessive force can land you in prison with a few "old friends" aching to play "butt darts" and "stick the piggy" with an occasional "cock-meat sandwich". And calling for the guard probably won't help much, one bad apple and all. Thinking anything but this, leaving the house with more than "I hope I can help someone today" or some specific agenda in the realm of "I'm gonna pick up the trash in the park and around the neighborhood" is not a healthy thing. We are neither Judge nor Jury.... to exact punishment as befits our own moral sensibilities is to not only ignore the ideals we seek to uphold but to deny someone their constitutionally granted right to due process and judgment by a jury of their peers. While I'm the first to say that no twelve people can know what is really "right" or "just", (we are flawed) I would not deny a man his right to be heard and possibly receive therapy or some other help he may need. Anyone that calls themselves a vigilante is saying that they don't care what the public they protect thinks. Not caring who fears you is another step away from "Hero". Why not say you're an "Anti-Hero"? At least it sounds kinda legal..... we must each remember that at the the end of the day, our actions and words can have an impact that's felt by others far away that we may never meet. This community can be brought to great heights or reduced to rubble and the realm of memory because of the actions of those in it. Whatever comes, we can only place the credit or blame on our own heads.
A HERO'S ROAD- RLSH BASICS
Along the road a hero travels, he or she will encounter a wide variety of challenges and obstacles. When such an event seems about to cause you to break don't forget to breath, and that you chose to do this. It's not even your job, just an "extreme hobby" and you get neither check nor benefits.... aside from feeling good for doing your part. Glory, praise and adulation are things for rock stars and actors, most of us aren't the type and others don't desire fame. Stage presence is not something one should cultivate unless it's part of your curriculum. If you want fame go to American Idol. It is always best for one to be prepared when going out to do anything, when you're out to help people it's best to first assess how you can help people. Anything from litter patrol to CPR (which requires certification) can be called for at any given time. The logical starting point is to check into your local laws to familiarize yourself with the things you can and cannot legally do to uphold the law. After that you should think about your community and it's inhabitants. What has happened before or could happen around you that you know of? Is your neighborhood home to gangs or high crime? Are there elderly folks nearby? Do you live next to a lake or forest? Are there vandals destroying things or "tagging" the local businesses? Knowing things such as these will give you an idea of the training and equipment you may need when out in public. If you have a wide variety of plants and animals around you should acquaint yourself with it's members and learn which can be dangerous or lethal and which can help you.
Obviously self-defense training and exercise are a requirement if you wish to patrol, but so are a cellular phone and camera. Knowledge of the customs and languages of your neighbors is an added bonus, having this in your arsenal will help during stressful situations, to avoid embarrassing blunders in etiquette and will help you laugh when the joke's at your expense. CPR and other emergency medical training is great and can be learned and certified from EMT training, Lifeguard training and even classes at your local hospital or community center. Never become complacent in your studies, there is always something to learn and knowledge is a powerful ally. Classes in criminology, forensics, law, psychology, sociology and science are but a few of those available that could help to round out a hero's qualifications. Take the time to learn about the RLSH community and those it is comprised of.... getting to know the people you interact with and could possibly work with one day is a good idea. Knowing what you can about a colleague can only save you both from embarrassment and make any future collaboration easier on any involved. Of course the areas one should study number many more than those herein, depending on terrain, population, local political and social climate and the laws of ones home jurisdiction the knowledge and training required or beneficial varies from one hero to the next. The things listed here are merely examples that outline some beneficial studies.
When it comes to the equipment and utilities we carry, many of the same factors have relevance. What can legally be carried in your area? What will be helpful in your endeavors? What could you need? What could happen? of course, most of this can be covered by training courses and such, but some things are essential. A prime example, a cell phone. 911, 411 or to get a tow truck.... this is your best weapon. A camera, voice recorder and notebook to gather and record information and evidence. A compass or GPS can also help (as does a knowledge of your surroundings like street names and such) many heroes in the field. A flashlight for dark nights and shadowy corners is good to have. The benefits of a first aid kit are many and frequently encountered. Self defense gear varies state to state or even county to county. The right job gets you not only the proper training but legal right to purchase carry and use a variety of tools useful for a patrolling hero if faced with a violent or armed perp. For the rest of us, there's E-bay and classes for certain permits and such. Armor and other protective gear is another area one should consider, how much is too much? What might you realistically need? Where is your priority and what can wait? Rations; food and water to sustain your vigilance, vigor and vitality. When going out to face destiny, do it on a full stomach and with fuel in a reserve tank. You never know when it's gonna turn from a trip down the road into a road trip. The final component is your "utility belt" or pack. Having the toys is useless if you have pockets full of them and grabbing one triggers the rest to cascade to the ground at an inopportune moment. Make sure you have plenty of space, easy access to the vitals and lack the tendency to get hung up on your surroundings.
Another topic of consideration is method of transportation, be it your bicycle, roller blades, car, your "Chev-ro-legs and five-point-toes" or even the city bus, a hero's gotta do what a hero's gotta do. Of course there are factors like where you live as opposed to where you patrol and the distance between or whether you live inside or outside the limits of your city or town and again how far away if out of town? Are you going alone or with a partner or group? How wide an area do you plan on covering? How often? If driving, where will you leave your car if necessary? Is parking readily available? What time does the bus run? Should you take a cab? Would it be better if you took your skateboard or simply walked?
Now is the point in the show where we come around to attire and alter ego. Although you most likely already have a snazzy name picked out and a billion stunning and creative ideas for a "Super Suit" in mind, it really wasn't that important. While a friendly and approachable appearance and attitude is required for any RLSH that is out in public and announcing your super hero name when asked "Who are you masked stranger?" is really fun and all, being properly out-fitted and prepared is infinitely more valuable when the choice to become a RLSH is made. A cool name and spiffy costume won't resuscitate a poor swimmer after you pull him from a pool or absorb the impact of a knife or gun as good as having the proper equipment and training will. If you're only doing charity and activism work, a name and costume coupled with CPR and that rarely necessary stage presence is an okay start. If you're on the street you need a bigger bag of tricks to cover the bases. After that it's all about the secret lair, be it fortress, cave, satellite or tree house whatever the form of your sanctum sanctorum it should reflect you as a person and a hero while having a spiffy name that says it's your base of operations. All of these things in effect, you will have begun on your journey towards a brighter tomorrow.
LITERARY SLEIGHT OF HAND
A while back I found myself in the middle of one of those "heated arguments" with my GF. When she gets angry it's impossible for her to say a kind word so she clams up. I'm a talker most the time and it usually isn't very helpful with her, especially since I joke a lot. Especially when I'm stressed. Anyways, some time during our battle of BS, she shut up and I began to write. The content was somewhere along the lines of the following;
"Although you're extremely upset and have good reason, I'd appreciate if you took the time to read this (basically, you know it was more. It was just not for you guys)" I continued, "Think about the magician that goes out on stage to perform his tricks and illusions for an audience. When he comes on stage, from that moment on, his mouth and hands are constantly in motion (unless his act demands otherwise) and with every elaborate gesture he keeps the audience rapt. Now it is common knowledge that while the magician is talking and drawing attention to his left hand, his right hand is getting the rabbit in the hat, it's just catching him in the act that evades most spectators. The whole time they sit there watching they know full well it's a show full of trap doors and tricky maneuvers but they applaud and sit awe-struck as seemingly impossible acts occur before their eyes. This has gone on for centuries, same hat, same rabbit, the only change is the man doing the talking. Still we go to see the show and marvel at the sudden appearance of the floppy eared garden terrorist. So as you sit and watch that cute little bunny come out of the hat in the magicians hand... it's kinda hard to be mad at me, huh?"
The original piece was a bit longer but the point is the same. Sometimes a simple bit of sleight of hand can ease a troubled mind and drain the tension. Needless to say, she smiled when she punched me after reading it. Then she told me I was an asshole cause I was right. She couldn't think about the rabbit and stay mad at me at the same time.
So it's a bit random but I think I got some valid stuff in there.
